Ken Burns bores me to fucking death. I can't fault someone for spending his entire career trying to take history and make it accessible to everyone, but it doesn't change the fact that the man is essentially making the same movie over and over again. He takes the same basic ingredients - archival photographs, fawning historians and biographers, endless violin music and narrators with vaguely mid-Atlantic accents - and just churns out films like sausage. Mind-numbing, hagiographic, sepia-toned sausage.
Maybe when he finally keels over dead in the middle of a zoom-and-pan on an old photograph, they'll collect all of his works into one DVD box set large enough to crush a small horse. And it will be called: Ken Burns Presents, the Entirety of Fucking Civilization.
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